Friday, May 19, 2006

22nd is a little bit depressing than 21st..

hepi besday weih bob weih..har har har..dah 22 siot..gilak aa..22 siot..takpe2..life starts at 40..har har har

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

abeh dah spring 2006

okeh..spring is in the past..now looking forward to summer and fall 2006..heh...just feeling a little disappointed today. ye aa..men basket kejap jek..sebab ramai org lain men..dang..pastu nak men volley takleh plak ujan..main bola..adoiii..penat doh men bola..ntah aa..maini basket tak penat pon..men bola lak penat..har har har..camana volley nih..risau aku..nak train camana nih? veale comencement..adelbert plak ramai men basket..

aa satu benda aku nak sound aa kat sape2 yg baca blog nih..satu benda jer..come on aa..tau aa bebudak volley tak training apa kan...tapi tak payah la nak kutuk2 blakang..tak kisah pon kutuk2 blakang..tp make sure aa budak volley takde time korang kutuk tuh..ingat main bola korang hebat sangat ker? menang premidwest jer dah bole naik belang ker? come on aa..bukan kitaorg tanak training aa weih..tengok aa keadaan sekeliling camana..hujan..adelbert penuh..veale takleh pakai..bukan cam bola byk jer padang bleh main..pastu hujan tak kisah plak tuh..giler power korang..kitaorg tak power camtu aa nak main dalam hujan..nanti demam..heh..come on aa...akal ada pakai aa..studies jer power common sense takde baik tak payah weih....bukan nak kate apa aa..hangin ko tau akk..cuba org kutuk2 bebudak bola..cam perang dunia ketiga korang marah..poyo aa..professional aa sket nak kutuk2 pon..nih kutuk main lepas jer tak tengok sekeliling..giler lesen L nak kutuk2..tak kisah aa...aku tak kisah aa korang nak kate apa..janji korang puas hati ngan bola sepak korang...aku puas hati ngan basketball n volleyball aku..

pada bebudak volley pon..bukan tanak buat training ker apa..aku tau aa ramai nak training..tp nak buat camana..takde tempat siot..bole jer nak train dig set spike kat mana2..tp dua tiga hari nih hujan..i know sumer org semangat midwest..semangat2 pon kesihatan kena jaga gak..semangat2 tapi jatuh sakit tak dapat main midwest kan teruk..mmg aa target nak dapt pingat..tapi kena aa wasatiah sket..nak pingat pon nak la jugak..tp nak gak sihat sumer..nih kang training gegila pastu demam plak time midwest..sebab main dalam hujan..pastu kalah cam biasa melayu salahkan satu sama lain..ceh..bosan..serios aa jgn aa zealous sangat dalam training nih..serious in training aku tak kisah..that is good..tapi zealous yg buat dia bahaya..

tu je aa aku nak sound oii bebudak bola..tau aa korang dahagakan pingat..and aku tau korang mmg terer..tapi jgn aa kate " ada ke volley cam takde jer tak training pon heh..bajet hebat"..come on aa..patut bagi aa sokongan..aku bukan budak bola pon aku sanggup main korang tau tak hujan2 tuh..nak tolong member punya pasal..tengok pon tadik cam tak cukup org jer...ntah aa..kalo ada org tersinggung aku minitak mahap awal2..korang singgung aku dulu..i'm just returning the favor..ntah aa kan..aku mana tau nikmat jadi juara..kitaorg dapat third place jer midwest...so we don't know the feeling of being champions..tak cam korang aa..menang premidwest..power siot..

yg tersinggung,
Bobby

Monday, May 8, 2006

my past..

hmm..nak tulih apa nih..besok exam..but aku rasa..nak tulih sumthing..sumthing yg aku rasa patut aku tulih sini..my past..

my past...

aku lahir 1030 malam 18 may 1984...bapak aku nak namakan aku ali or ahmad nama simple2..tapi mak aku tanak..nak nama grand2..sebab mak aku kate dia nak aku jadi grand cam nama aku..hidup aku best..seronok..dalam keluarga sederhana..ada satu mercedez lama yg bapak aku sayang giler..pastu..bapak aku beli kete proton first edition..sebab kete merz tu dah rosak..mmg takleh pakai dah..so kete proton tu aa a.k.a "Jibam" (sebab no. plate dia JBM) jadik kete kesayangan dia..pastu 1992..detik paling gelap hidup aku..jun 1992..pukul 10(rasanyer) tetiba telepon bunyi..kakak angkat aku shazana( kot nama dia lupa..) angkat telepon..tetiba dia nangis..aku tanya asal nangis..kakak aku tanak jawab..so aku bior je aa..tetiba..dalam kol 12 ke satu camtu sumer sedara mara dekat aku sampai umah...aku kecik time tuh pikir...uikk..ada kenduri best ke nih? pastu..pakcik aku yg rapat ngan akuk tarik aku ke tepi..pastu dia bagitau satu benda yg aku tak paham time tu..tapi akan aku ingat sampai bebiler.." adi..adi kena sabar ye nak ye...pakcik nak bagitau pon pakcik rasa berat hati pakcik.." aku tanya bagitau apa.." abah adi dah kembali ke rahmatullah nak" " adi kena byk bersabar ye nak ye"..walaupon aku tak berapa paham time tuh..tetiba aku rasa air mata aku mengalir..aku tak paham..kenapa aku nangis nih? apa nih? dalam masa seminggu aku rasa confuse..kenapa sumer org sedih nih..aku mmg tak tau apa time tu..abg sulung aku..menguncikan diri dalam bilik..abg second aku time tu nak amik SPM...biler mak aku balik..nampak mak aku sorang jer..mak aku tak nangis tak sedih apa pon...aku tanya dengan gaya selamba..abah mana mak? kat dalam lagi ke? time tu mak aku mmg dah tak bole tahan dah nak nangis..pastu baru aku tau abah takkan balik malaysia lagi..dia selamat dikebumi kat mekah...lepas aku dapat tau berita tu..aku mmg dah rasa takde tempat nak bergantung..sebab aku mmg rapat ngan ayah aku..org kate..biler kehilangan org tersayang..mmg peristiwa tu akan ubah perangai ko completely...and it's true..aku dulu mak aku kate aa..aku dah lupa dah sumer nih..aku kanak2 ceria aa kira..suka gelak2..suka tanya benda sumer..suka buat member..tapi..aku ubah completely..sadness overwhelmed me man..all the things that could make me happy was just not enough to make me smile again..even sarah..sarah my best friend at that time..i became kera sumbang..masam jer muka..mmg takleh dah nak buat muka hepi..then family aku pindah melaka..mak aku dapat keje lain..terpaksa amik keje lain..because of the pay..she's raising 5 kids on her own..at that time..3 of them was in UK..imagine how she had worked day and night..aku tak merungut..bila aku balik sekolah takde org kat rumah..just something to eat on the table...maybe nothing on the table..i did not say anything..because i know my mother..i know she is strong..but at night i know she cries a lot in her prayers..i felt so worthless because i can't help with anything..i don't have any frens at the maktab quarters because every kid there see me as the pengetua's son..not as a boy yg takde member..sumer tanak dekat ngan aku..sebab takut kalau aku pissed off ngan diorg parents diorg kena pecat..hahaha..wth man..makin lonely aku jadik..makin gloomy hidup aku..every day..just thinking why? kenapa abah? honestly..at certain times i was mad at god...but lama2..i just accept it...his time was up..but the trauma was dramatic..even my mother was concerned..every night my mom said i always say abah in my sleep..she cried when i do that..at school was no different..everyone first sees me as sombong anak pengetua MPPM..they thought that i was a rich person's son...i don't give a damn by that time..started smoking in darjah 5..everyone until now thinks that i lied about that..one thing my father told me..never lie..tapi kalo white lie ok..hehe..mmg terumbang ambing idup aku..tak tentu arah..tried hard to study..tapi paling tinggi pon nombor 7..last skali dapat no 1 was before my father died..peristiwa tu mmg bagi tekanan beso dalam hidup aku..tapi i have a datuk sedara at melaka.. and i treated him hampir cam aku anggap bapak aku sendiri..his kids were my first frens at melaka..and through them i found that my life could be happy again..i started to smile..started to do everithing with a positive look..when my mother got a new job in KL..at his house aa aku tinggal..with his kids yg aku anggap cam darah daging aku sendiri..my life was looking brighter and brighter..abes PMR aku dapat 7A 1B and he was the first person that i hugged..i cried like hell..because he was like a father to me but he died last february i think..so i lost two fathers already..so i'm possibly at my worst state this past 2 months..

i'm not telling you all this story to make you symphatize me..i don't need it..aku nak bagitau jer..korang kate hidup korang susah..hidup korang terumbang ambing..hidup korang tak tentu arah..think of this story..i lived without a father for 14 years already..i know ada org yg lagi teruk dari aku..but kalo cam korang datang US tapi keje korang tido, do nothing else but having a good time other than studying and you say to me that your life is miserable and doing those things makes your life a bit happier...that's bullshit..MY life is miserable..imagine seeing your mother crying in the middle of the night thinking of a way to get money to support her children overseas and in malaysia..imagine you are neglected alone at home day in and day out without anyone to talk to for three fucking years..hearing rumors that your mother is going to marry a dato' just after a week your father died and everyone believed that bullshit even your close relatives..THAT is miserable my frens..petty things like heartbreaks and backstabbers, fights even life at CASE all those other things are nothing to me..so please..don't do this to me anymore..don't say i am loaded with money..my mother is happy giving her kids money..because she was miserable when she can't give her kids money in the past..you think i wanted the money she gives? of course i do..but..not that much..i always say to her..sket2 jer..takyah banyak2..you know what she said?..takpe2...mak ada duit..mak ada duit..do you know how happy she is when she is saying that? for 5 years she struggled always saying adi..mak takde duit adi..mak takde duit..korang tau tak betapa terharunyer aku biler mak aku cakap camtu..so please...don't bitch about your petty problems yg aku rasa bole selesai..evryone has problems..but don't make your small problems big..because it's stupid..jgn aa besarkan2 masalah..masalhtu dah kecik..senang nak selesai..tapi korang besar2kan..adoii..

amik ler teladan..kalo tanak takpe..

Monday, May 1, 2006

the last day of classes

skarang ku kebosanan n kelapangan tetapi ku tiada idea yang bernas utk penulisan ini...hahaha...apa ko merepek nih bob..mengarut tul aa..

adeh...macam nak terkantoi jer semester nih..harap2 aa aku nyer CGPA tak drop teruk sangat..aku tak kisah GPA aku apa semester nih..tapi CGPA woo..kalo dah 2.sumthin nanti susah giler nak naik balik..adeh..dammit aa semester nih..baru perasan bukan susah pon class math tuh..aku jer yg buatkan dia susah..klas 314 pon sama..klas 315 pon sama..klas econ aku tak tau aa..mmg aku takde bakat kot dalam econ2 nih..tak paham aku..ngaaa...siot aa semester nih..what the hell am i doing this past 4 months? sulking? my ass aa sulking..not my style (cewahhh!!!..hahaha)...neglecting studies? nih mungkin aa kot..hahahaha...ntah aa setan byk siot badan nih..nih ada satu setan beso nih..kepala botak pakai spek..(aku ler tu)...arghhh...kalo aku struggle the whole semester ari tuh serios bole 3.5 sumthing ker..adoiiiii...tension aa aku camnih..sumer salah aku..ngaaaa...nak buat camana..bubur dah jadik nasi..eh eh silap nasik jadi bubur...

weekend ari tuh spring fest...apa yg best spring fest aku pon tak tau..biasa jek..sama jek tiap2 tahun...satu jer aa kot best..jumpa sofia comel tengah jalan2 pakai skirt labuh dia tuh pastu pakai t-shirt ketat..huhuhu..i know her fashion sense is a little questionable aa..tapi..sofia beb..nasib baik ko dah ada pakwe ( aku rasa je aa..u san tu pakwe dia kot..)..kalo tak dah lama aku masuk..har har har..dengar2 spring fest ari tuh laura ada buat kissing booth..ewwww...ada org kate best? dah berapa byk jantan dah minah tu cium...ewww...hahaha..lepas spring fest cam biasa gi lepak umah elyas..lama tak lepak umah tuh...pastu semalam ada terkontang kanting aku buat hw..hw math ngan jepon jer siap...econ..buat dua soklan jer..harap2 aa gary bagi full points..sebab selalu camtu..kuikuikui...

cavs kalah semalam..adehhh...bodo aa...bukan susah pon wizards..drive in je aa..bukan beso pon wizards nyer players..takkan injured nyer aa kalo ko langgar..dia injured ada aku rasa..nak jugak shoot perimeter dah tau percentage masuk tak tinggi..aku lain ler..aku bukan pro...selamba jer shoot suka ati aku...hohohoho...adeh..

ari nih last day class jepon...adoiii..sedey aa kishi sensei dah tak ajo next semester..hagiwara sensei la plak menanti..ngaaa..takpe2..sofia amik lagi klas 301 next year..yes2..next year nyer oral nak buat ngan sofia..hahahahaha...merepet siot..

nak main basketball ker main game ptg nih? main basket penat..tido besok mesti tak bangun nyer..hmmm..main game aa kot..har har har